Wednesday, May 27, 2009

My American Idol

Just when my 34.9 year old mind starts to doubt my potential and puts me into a funk, this glorious image to the right reminds me of just why the Creator put me here on this earth. Today I'm going to devote the next several paragraphs to our First Lady Michelle Obama. Oh how I marvel at this woman and see so much of myself, my mother, my mother's mother and hopefully what my daughter will evolve into later on in her life. Not so much the obvious of being married to the President of the United States, but just being an undeniably awesome, fearless, dedicated, headstrong, humble and a fiercely beautiful Black woman. There, I said it. For the first time in my life I can see myself in the image of the woman living at 1600 Pennsylvania avenue. I must admit, just glancing at her as she graces counts of magazines (the May issue of "Essence" being my all-time favorite) brings chills over my whole body. Just the thought of Mrs. Obama being not only the face of the First Lady of the United States, but the face of Black women projected to the rest of the civilized world...I can't stand the magnitude sometimes. Look up "strong Black woman" in the dictionary - oh wait, who am I fooling - it's 2009...google the phrase "strong Black woman" and I'm sure this picture will be staring back at you. She is just one more example of the type of woman my mamma groomed me to be that I can add to the pantheon of strong Black women in my life: my mother, my nana, my nana's sisters, my mother's cousins, my cousins, my Sista-Girls, the list goes on and on. She makes it all look so easy; motherhood, marriage, career, Mom-In-Chief. She reminds me that on those days when my daughter is just a tad reluctant to get out of bed in the morning for school, my clothes haven't been ironed and my husband can't find his keys - I need to chill out, take a deep breath and HANDLE MY BUSINESS! I'm sure Michelle has her melt-down moments, but the presence of her mother right upstairs, the undying love and devotion of her "Pumpski" Barack, the giggles and hugs from those two angels Sasha and Malia along with a tail wag from Bo are all she probably needs to get back on track and keep it movin'. Thank you Michelle for just being you.

MIND: Elated. Plain and simple. Ever since 1/20/09 I have a new appreciation for myself and my role on this earth. My head is held a bit higher. My shoulders arch a bit further back and instead of letting life and all the negativity get the best of me I've learned to take my Michelle Obama vitamins for a good day's supply of energy, optimism, humor and "ride or die-ness".

BODY: Still on this whole Atkins plan. But looking at Mrs. Obama reminds me that no double cheeseburger from Mc Donald's is gonna taste as good as I'm gonna look by the end of this summer just doing what I know I need to do and not making excuses for my horrible eating habits.

SOUL: Probably 50% of my newfound motivation is coming from the little Black girl I brought into this world almost 6 years ago. She's very perceptive and she and I share a bond that's as air-tight as mommy and daughter can be. I want her to be able to look at me the way I look at my mother (and the way I am sure Sasha & Malia look at Michelle)...with complete confidence and certainty that Mommy can and will handle anything that comes her way. She'll do it with style, grace and wit. She might occasionally be the underdog but NEVER the victim. Mommy holds herself accountable but doesn't beat herself up for being an imperfect being. Mommy learns from her mistakes and poor choices and at the end of the day Mommy can only love and support everyone else if she does those very things for herself first.

ETC: I'm just dying for the day when I see a pic of Michelle with Malia sitting between her knees getting her hair "twisted up" with a jar of Dax and a cup of water on a hot summer's afternoon. Now THAT will be classic!

Monday, May 18, 2009

Mind Over Matter



"The setback is the set-up for the comeback!" (BJ Coleman, friend of Miz Star Jones). Laawwwd, if that isn't my new and personal mantra for the 0-9. Lemme stop trippin' over all the petty and unimportant thoughts that occupy my mind and force me off track when I'm on a serious mission. In retrospect, most of my greatest achievements in life have come after times of trials and tribulations. I say this as I much on a garden salad and sip on Crystal Light for an Atkins' appropriate lunch. Yeah, I said it...I'm back on the bandwagon. Most might feel it is an automatic set-up for failure as I am forbidden from any sugar, starch or more than 20gr. of carbohydrates per day. But you know what...folks are lucky that I'm NOT a millionaire, cuz I would have had a head to toe nip & tuck about 5 years ago...for reals. Miz Star knows what I'm talking about and I can't hate on her for taking matters into her own hands...cuz (IMHO) she looks fantastic!!!

MIND: My mind is a little mushy right now, but I'm working on it....just battling the mind demons that are telling me to "give up" in certain situations. My inner-athlete is saying " Are you crazy???? You keep pushing 'til you drag yourself over the finish line." My finish line reads "135lbs and healthy".

BODY: Snaps for me for playing basketball with my step-daughter this weekend!!! It was so much fun. I forgot how much I used to love working up a good sweat all in the name of outdoor recreation. Plus, it gave my ego a wee boost to know that I could keep up with a girl less than 1/2 my age who plays bball herself. I must remember that I really have NO excuses for not getting into better shape by the end of this summer.

SOUL: I'll turn 35 in 5 weeks from today. Scary...yes. exciting...yes. I'm looking forward to signing a new lease on life. I am sure that my American Idol Michelle Obama has a lot to do with it. Once I learned not only to admit but accept and improve upon my shortcomings, the feelings of guilt and pessimism slowly vanished. My despair is now replaced with hope. My doubt is now replaced with a renewed sense of fearlessness and mental fortitude. Watch out world!!! The old me is back and the sky is my limit.

ETC: Damn you, Celtics :-( I'm hoping to see LeBron /vs./ Kobe in the finals!!

Monday, May 11, 2009

Back from a little break


Ahhh, the splendor that is Mother's Day....completely wonderful this year! My hubby and mini-me woke me up around 9am with hugs and kisses, cards, gifts and verbal tributes to me and my role as Mommy. Next, a trip to IHOP (yum x3)..a stroll through Harvard's campus...a stroll through Boston Commons...afternoon sundaes for all from Mickey D's....a 4 hour nap.....a hubby-made dinner of fettuccine & chicken Alfredo w/garlic bread (yum x4). Plus, the weather was perfect - not too hot or too cold, a bit windy though...but perfect nonetheless. Truly the best gifts are the ones that are heart-felt and thoughtful :-)
MIND: So for the millionth time, it's back to the Atkins' Diet for me starting today. My bday is soon approaching and I really have no excuse. Perfect day so far (as I currently nosh on my garden salad sans my favorite garlic-seasoned croutons) so I am not planning on spoiling it. My total goal is 75lbs. Pretty ambitious, but in my younger years, all I had was ambition and big dreams - I need to get back to that.
BODY: (see "MIND")...other than that, feeling okay. Have to remember to start taking my multi-vitamins again as Atkins' won't allow any fruit or juice during the induction phase (which I will be on for an extended period of time).
SOUL: Yesterday was so great and refreshing that it feels like I just came back from vacation. The Hubby and I were getting so bogged down with the baggage of life and the stress that comes along with it that getting out in the sunshine and fresh air recharged our engines. Plus, my mini-me kept us in stiches with her quirky sense of humor...she's the funniest little thing at 5 years old. For the 4 hours that we were out, we just enjoyed each other's company, walked slow, noticed t he world around us and relished in the pure joy on our daughter's face as she ran and twirled and climbed in the park. Just what the doctor ordered.
ETC: Did you see the Celtics win at the buzzer last night??? Friggin' awesome! I have never witnessed a buzzer-beater in real time (only on highlight replays) so I was excited - I know, pretty corny and unimportant to most people, but I though it was cool. Also, my sis is planning a visit next month - now that she's 22 we can actually hang out like BFF's and grab a drink or two - NICE!!

Wednesday, May 6, 2009



THIS is how I want to feel every day....really "yippee skippy". BTW, this is my little sis just moments after receiving her undergrad degree last weekend. Despite the extra year that it took her, the rain that all of us sat through and her ji-nor-mous amount of student loan debt, she's still giving life a thumbs up and the best kool aid smile she could muster up....gotta love it!

MIND: feeling really woozy...had a pre-treatment for my upcoming root canal this morning and the novocaine is just now wearing off. But i'm, proud of me for going in the first place. I've been avoiding the dentist for longer than I would like to admit, so today was a big step for me

BODY: Did a bunch of walking this morning - in the rain no less. I could have taken the train 2 stops from my daughter's school to the dentist, but I decided to hike it and smell all the fresh flowers and trees in bloom along the way. I know, not a big deal to most, but passing up public transportation is a BIG deal for me.

SOUL: No complaints today...which is good for me. Sure there are things that i should have started/fininshed/made progress on during my work day, but I can only do what I can do...I'm sure ALL of my unfinished business will be here when I get back in about 15 hours...OH WAIT A MINUTE...MY JAM JUST CAME ON..."POKER FACE" BY LADY GAGA.....OH SNAP! i'm chair dancing right NOW!!!!

ETC: i think the celtics play tonight in game #2 of their series...i can't take it. i am officially a boston sports fanatic. I have missed sleep on too many a night b/c of some god-awful 9th inning for the sox, a double or triple overtime for the celtics or some nail-biting last quarter for the patriots - but I LOVE BOSTON SPORTS! such great rivalries and the victory parades are awesome :-)

-til tomorrow,

LMM

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Blog Virgin

SO...this is what it feels like to to myself out there for all of the world to see. I must say, feels pretty darn liberating. No format. No restrictions. No worries. I have always thought "what if I was a blogger????" Well, now I am. Though I must admit, it all started with Facebook. It reminded me that there is a whole world out there and that every person matters. Okay, so here are my thoughts for today:

MIND: totally stressed. I have a dentist appointment in the morning and I'm really embarrassed that I have spent 5 years teaching my daughter all about good oral hygeine and taking care of her pearly whites and I have totally taken myself off of that priority list. No time like the present, i guess. Kinda scared, but knowing is better than ignoring I suppose.

BODY: (see "MIND" for what is physically ailing me right now)...other than that, I'mon day #1 of my "better body" lifestyle: ate yogurt and granola for breakfast, a garden salad and H2O for lunch, staring @ the apple that I was supposed to have eaten by now and thinking about a low-cal dinner to be eaten in the next 2 hours

SOUL: feel totally rejuvenated after a long weekend spent w/the parents and my sister who just graduated from college on Saturday..."GO SWOOPY!" (that's my nickname for her). I haven't seen them since Christmas and a visit was just what I needed. OH, Mother's Day is this Sunday so I'm looking forward to the cake my Sweet (that's the hubby) and our daughter will bake for me...woo hoo!

ETC: I am so obsessed w/the BRAVO series "Real Housewives" and the NYC show comes to an end tonight...can't wait.