I will never forget

Anyone who lived through the horrific events of 9/11/01 will feel the need to reflect on every September 11th for the rest of their lives. I'm not going to re-hash my every steps and feelings and memories of that day...way too painful. Instead choose to discuss the value adde my life by experiencing such an event at the age of 27 and living by myself in the city of Boston at that time.

MIND: Sheer panic...confusion...sickness...shock....mentally paralyzed. My father worked in lower Manhattan, my sister and mother were in the Poconos, I had close friends and family living in NYC, Pittsburgh and D.C. - and 2 of the planes left from Logan Airport (just a few minutes north of Boston). Could I have been any more entrenched in the chaos?

BODY: Shaking, sweaty, crying, headache, nauseous...more crying

SOUL: That day's events were His way of showing me that I need to no longer take the gift of life for granted. I could have been one of the approximate 3,000 that never made it home that night. From that point I never ended a conversation or a visit with my parents and sister w/o an "I love you" or a "thank you" or a bear hug. Yes, death is inevitable but I never thought about it in the context of going to work or riding the train or flying for leisure. Because I now live in a managed state of fear (have not boarded a plane since 2000 and have no plans in doing so probably ever again) I have to make the decision each day not to let it cripple my life. When I drop my daughter off @ school I make sure that she gets one last kiss and hug just in case He sees it fit to call eitehr of us Home before we lay eyes on each other again. When my husband and I disagree I dwell on the fact that this man would walk over glass for me (as I would for him) and not on the fact that for one moment in time we did not agree on something that 99.9% of the time is non-life-threatening. We don't go to bed angry or hold grudges - too many of those left behind as of 9/12/01 carry that burden of guilt and neither of us wants to seal our fate with that. I take more photographs now. The one and only picture I ever took of the WTC (after living in NYC until the age of 18) was taken from the top of the Empire State Building on Wednesday 8/15/01. I was giving one of my good sista-girls an NYC tour and the ESB was our stop mid-day. The sun was shining, about 85 degrees, perfect. I made sure to take a picture from each side of the observation deck. At first I thought "it's just the World Trade Center...I've seen it a million times...why take a picture of it now?" I knew I would be back in the City another time - I would have preferred a picture of it lit up at night, but took the photograph anyway. I was back in the city for Thanksgiving...but the WTC was gone for good.